A Tribute to MacGyver’s Ingenuity

July 22, 2009

I’ve been fascinated by MacGyver’s shows recently.  I’ve summarized most of MacGyvers’ improvisational antics and some life lessons that might be generally applicable below.  If you’re thinking about becoming the next MacGyver, don’t forget to bring your essentials: a Swiss Army Knife, duct tape, matches and a sharp mind!

Disclaimer: some of these are obviously old school and not complete recipes.  Do your homework before you attempt anything and don’t blame me if you mess it up.  Done.

Season 1
Pilot: Use a paperclip to diffuse a warhead.  Hang a semiautomatic rifle facing down and bracket it with a stick under the trigger.  Form a short delay by hanging the rifle from a tree with a string and then lighting the string on fire.  A fire hose and water help boost an I-beam a few inches, enough to squeeze under it.  Chocolate neutralizes and gums up an acid leak to give Mac a bit more time.  Some pieces of sodium put in a water soluble cold capsule dropped into a glass jar with water in it and covered with lots of protective material (like dirt) between it and people forms a delay and a sort of bomb to bust through a wall.  Don’t forget to tell the surface you’re ok with morse code by hacking the power supply to the lighting system even when every other form of communication is cut off!
The Golden Triangle: In a junkyard, some tires make a nice diversion while a gigantic electromagnet picks up a gun and briefcase with top-secret missile launch codes.  Get to the trunk through the back seat and use the car jack to pop open the trunk to avoid getting crushed and escape without being seen.  High lifting a car with the bad guys in it makes an impromptu prison.  Strung out and tied up?  You’d better hope you made a friend in the new countryside fast who will be willing to hand you your Swiss Army Knife!  Standing up for the downtrodden might help.  Release some pigs for a diversion.  A flare makes a nice initial shot to set off a gas tank.  A lifejacket when inflated pulls the tab to an inflatable boat which pulls a signal flare against a tire to blow up some explosives.  Obviously.  Fill bamboo sticks with fire ash and alcohol to make a basic form of tear gas.  Duct tape a hose leading into the buried bamboo to the exhaust pipe of a car.  Turn it on and rev the engine to spread the gas everywhere.   Dig a gigantic pit off to the side, then cover a normal road as if it’s a trap and you’ve caught yourself a bad guy when they blindingly make a quick detour.  Tie some steel cable onto a jeep winch and the other side to a helicopter to reel them in.  If you need to learn some knots, check out the knot tutorials by the Art of Manliness!
Thief of Budapest: Being pursued by about 20 men on horses with swords?  If your friend in a helicopter gets there in time just hook their line onto the horse’s saddle and you’re off and away.  Spilled marbles make a great pickpocketing opportunity.  Tie two planks around an old lighting fixture to form a slight distraction and allow someone to jump on a truck.  Combine salt, surgar, and weedkiller.  Spread some of this combo over a rag and pour water through it to make something like dynamite.  Note, it will go off without warning after it mostly finishes bubbling!  Wear a uniform to gain instant credibility: either as a soldier or mechanic.  Use a tractor to pull some razor wire accross camp and separate the good guys from the bad guys.  Throw a match into some powder to make a quick explosion and get people’s attention.  Who’s going to argue with spontaneous combustion?  Use a cut up credit card to mess with any mechanical traffic light signal.  Oh, and Mac used mini’s way before the second Italian Job…  Duct tape a police transmitter to a radio, then onto some balloons to broadcast your own short distance radio station and disrupt other police communication.
Trumbo’s World: A battery and 2 quarters to form a makeshift spot welder.  Make a flamethrower with a steel tube connected to a big tank of gasoline.  A small bomb made with gasoline sets fire to a dam and floods away billions of ravenous ants.
Last Stand: Make a thermite torch with a bicycle frame filled with some rust and magnesium flakes.  Ignite it with a road flare to cut through even a reinforced armored vehicle.  I don’t know if I’ll get to try this, but it’s a sweet hack!  Make some quick fake grenades by wrapping fertilizer sprayed with starting fluid and suffed with cotton into newspaper.  A water tanker will floor the bad guys for a little bit.  A remote control plane makes a brief diversion, especially with a small grenade tied to it.  Melt some ice in a freezer by holding it close to a light.  Make it all go straight into the lock to bust the lock wide open as the water expands inside the lock.
The Heist: Buff up some dice with a shoe shining machine to ensure craps will go your way.  Then get rid of the hot dice by dropping them into your Bloody Mary.  Just make sure you don’t give it to anyone.  A drain pipe makes a way to send a million worth of diamonds from the third floor into a waiting car (not recommended!).  Magnets near slot machines make them go crazy.  Use duct tape and a mirror to divert a security camera.  Pick a lock with your pocket knife, then divert a fiber optic security system with some clear plastic tubing.  Take advantage of a pet bird to “accidentally” set off an alarm.  Wine glasses filled with various levels of wine and then rubbed around the top make a tune to open an audially triggered safe.  Tie a big parachute to your car, buckle in and drive out the back of a plane to really baffle your captors.
Hellfire: Springs and a plywood platform on top of sand will isolate old dynamite with nitroglycerin leaking out.  An old refrigerator and  constant stream from a fire hose form a heat shield to protect you from a serious oil well fire.  Get close enough and drop some of that dynamite down the shaft to burn up all the oxygen and stop the fire.  Don’t forget to keep yourself soaked in water even as you inch nearer to the blaze.
The Prodigal: Sawdust to cloud vision and a saw to shoot pieces of wood.  Dry ice, soda and fizz wizz simulate smoke from a fire coming through the vents.  Cutting the radiator line to let the fluid drain out will incapacitate a car pretty quickly.  Pretend your busy and need to get somewhere else to allay others suspicions.  Push some heavy furniture against a door to give yourself a bit of time.  A bit of propellant, a metal spike with a rope tied to it and a telescope tube to make a cannon to shoot the spike into the crook of a tree and make a zipline to get out of a gangster’s house.  Or I’ve heard shooting yourself out of a bad situation was popular.
Target Macgyver: A toaster turned on to heat up some ice that balances an entire load of pots and pans works as a delayed timer and diversion. A hose trips some bad guys in a rush. Macgyver teams up with his uncle to brainstorm ideas.  He comes up with using a sharp rock to chop a large limb, a few reeds on a piece of bark as a decoy and using hazlenuts roasting to simulate gunfire.  Maybe he’s better off working alone?
Deathlock: A jet ski disguised as a coffin is a nice touch if you’re trying to get over a guarded bridge separating the border of two countries.  Disrupt the audio and video camera system sent through a radio frequency by broadcasting a broadband signal with multiple kitchen blenders etc going.  A bowl connected to a juicer spinning around also helps out.  Trust beautiful girls at your own peril (not the last warning).  A wheeled, motorized cart with a knight head on top attracts gunfire tied to motion detectors.  Baking soda poured into a pot with vinegar in it as well as a fire extinguisher make a smoke screen.  Make an early warning system by putting a bunch of loose metallic obstacles in someone’s way.  Use a mirror to see around a corner to see someone while they can’t see you.  Water cannons are always helpful, especially if they can force a person into an electrical fuse box.
Nightmares: A shiny gum wrapper makes a good lure to attract fish.  Connect a bed to a prison door with the bed springs to make a great ramming device.  Use your belt (hollow) to connect some water with an electrical socket.  The inevitable short circuit is sure to get the attention of your guards.  Some rope holding up some water bottles set on fire will distract some people while getting them away from you.  Hitting a hollow metal rod on the top of a fire hydrant to create a magnetized rod helps Mac retrieve the antidote from the gutter drain.  Seems like a cool trick!
Countdown: Make a quick harness to lower yourself out of a helicopter with some rope and a few carabiners.  Neon signs once cracked will suck up phosphorous in a vacuum, milk will help neutralize an acid based detonator.  Learn from others mistakes as much as you can.
The Enemy Within: If your brake fluid leaks out because of a cut line, try using the steering fluid as a hydraulic.  Drop a compound with hexamethaline diamine into adipic acid with some iron particles.  Apply a magnetic field (stirrer) to make Nylon.  Two candlesticks held with oven mitts and connected to a light socket make a rudimentary defibrillator.
Every Time She Smiles: Poke through drywall with a coat stand.  Then connect coat hangers between a chair and a conveyor belt to complete the hole. A merry go round with metal rings thown in the gears creates a sudden stop for a few KGB agents.  Grab a deep cooking pot, some pest control, 4 cups of soap flakes, garnished with tile cleaner and mix. Time Delay fuse: bunch of lard wrapped in single layer of newspaper sprinkled with crystals of oven cleaner, left to marinate under flow of natural gas.  Diesel exhaust and water to create a really slippery road.
To Be a Man: Duct Tape and a crashed satellite with plastic wings (survived the atmosphere!?!) make a paraglider…I’m sure you’ll all use this one!  A bandana and rocks make a sling for self defense. A butane tank minus the top serves as a blunt bullet.  Use a hot poker to cauterize a bullet wound; don’t forget a stick between your teeth for this one.  A rope tied to a weakened pole helps collapse a roof on your pursuers.
Ugly Duckling: A signal generator and an amplifier to make a high frequency immobilizer.  Spray can to cool down a hot bar. Liquid in cactus for low level current to power a radio.  2 radios with wires made into a single loop at the end to make 2 directional antennas.  Point both watches at north and lay the straight antenna part across the dial of the watch.  Turn until find signal on each watch and read off time.  Average value of times on both watches to find direction of third antenna. Using the headlights from a jeep as a parabolic reflector, focus the light through binoculars and bounce it off a flat mirror to heat up a target.
Slow Death: Who can forget the grab a bottle and knock a guy out by hitting him on the temple trick. An alarm clock with wires taped to blood vessel in your neck and a blood pressure cuff form a quick lie detector.  Reversing the wires in a fuse box make it something you won’t want to touch.
The Escape: Soccer ball, olive oil and newspaper make a paper mache hot air balloon.  Cotton balls are lit below to provide hot air.  Liquid PCP for a bomb; to time need a circuit that will blow when you want it to: ice melting at a given rate works.  Tape recorder of a spatula hitting fan blades for simulated helicopters.  Gunpowder trail forms a standard time delay fuse.
A Prisoner of Conscience: Stick a potato in the exhaust to immobilize a car and surround it with fumes.  Jam a pursuing boat’s intake with a first aid kit tied to some life preservers.  Break a lightbulb to get out the Tungsten filaments for a lock pick.  Stop up a sink and let the water run.  Caulk the top of a bucket then pour a hardening agent on the caulk; use to attach a rod on top of the bucket, tying a flag to the end of the stick.  Let the bucket float in the water to form a diversion.
The Assassin: A thick plank of wood to drive over tire spikes (like at a rental car company). Two strong wires in a fake mustache bent in one location near the end as a handcuff lock pick.  Fake skin to conceal a pin, a cup and pea to make a blow dart.

Season 2
The Eraser: A big mylar sheet and a mirror provide a way to fake someone’s death by making a fake image of them; then a siren made by blowing across two overlapped mylar sheets scares the bad guys away.
The Human Factor: Sneak under a cargo truck and hang on to get through a guard gate.  A magnifying lens and watch crystal rolled up in the sports pages makes a telescope.  A lasso tight rope allows Mac to get across pressure based floor sensors.  Plaster dust picks up hand print, cover with jacket and press gently.  Get killer guard robots with infrared sensors to shoot each other by lighting pieces of paper containing magnets and sticking them to the robots.
Eagles: An innertube and bicycle make a great slingshot.  Turn on a propane tank and grindstone in a shed.  Shoot the thing with ball bearings as ammunition to send a spark from long distance.  Vegetable oil and stuffing from a chair make a self warmed nest.
The Wish Child: A chisel can be made from the slat from an A/C vent and a spigot will do for a hammer.  An umbrella with fabric removed forms a grappling hook.  If you don’t want to be touched, appear very dirty.  Fill a room with fire extinguisher goo to distract everyone.
Twice Stung: Full of psychological games; he did switch the wires in a control switch to shock the user.  Ahha!
Final Approach: A parachute makes a good tent and sharpened limbs let Macgyver catch some trout.  A long stick and warm coal coax a snake away from out of a sleeping bag.  For a mountain lion, hold still, don’t look in the eye and give em a cold shower.  For a home made stethoscope, try a radio amplifier and two wires.  Use a surveyor’s tool to make a straight 300 yard line and a spade to dig a 1 foot deep trough straight through it.  A split piece of wood makes a front ski for a plane while a mud filled trough forms the runway.
Jack of Lies: A line tied to an old airplane engine and the other end into a circle on the ground, energized by an old battery submerged in wine (vinegar is better) forms a snare.
The Road Not Taken: A baseball, a bit of fuel and some grease form an alarm system.  Use a belt buckle for a knife or make a flare with bamboo filled with fertilizer to make a quick rocket.  Incidentally, MacGyver gets rejected…tough to see.
Silent World: Make a water clock trigger: Use some strong sticks to form a balance with a bag of water on each side.  Tie the end of the beam to a starter switch on a boat.  Poke a hole in one of the bags and you’ve got your delay.  A snare catches some bad guys who don’t look down while they are running.  A metal tea pot is a great weapon.
Phoenix Under Siege: Wrap a steel faucet with copper wire.  Tie the ends to a few batteries to make an electromagnet. Use a paper ticket to stop the timer from contacting the trigger of a bomb.
Family Matter: A paddle and life jacket with a jacket over it makes a quick dummy.  An oil soaked rag into a gas can gives enough delay to get away once you light it.  Bamboo and swamp gas bottled with mud and a swamp grass fuse make good methane bombs.
Birth Day: 1 inch by 1 foot planks about 15 feet long reinforced by empty gas cans to form a ramp for a Jeep out of a 4 foot deep trench.  Signal flags spelling HELP and a sail soaked in water then filled with  helium make a balloon to hang them from to get the word out.
Pirates: How to deal with an old school tripline mine.  First click you’re fine, maintain tension on the wire so the switch doesn’t go back by tying a line onto the main trip and then on to something nearby.  A push button mine will be armed with pressure; maintain it with a stick jammed into the button.  Having access to 83 of the best divers in the world can’t do anything but help!
Out in the Cold: A pole to drill out of an avalanche, then a hollow pole to shoot a parachute out made of a piece of fabric and small counterweight into the air.  Duck sauce temporarily blinds an assailant.
Dalton, Jack of Spies: A few wood braces aren’t enough to stop the compactor in a garbage truck, but pulling levers outside with some scrap metal worked.
Bushmaster: A redo of the machine gun with a time delay fuse made with a tree, stick, rock and shoestring.  Also use a rat as a transporter for a freon cartridge from a refrigerator to freeze a lock.  Eggwhites will clog small radiator holes.  A steel rod hitting railroad rails gives a spark enough to ignite some gas.
DOA: Macgyver: Muriatic acid (hull cleaner and pool cleaner to fight algae) and ammonia mixed neutralize each other and give instant chemical fog.  Don’t forget to cover your nose!  Interesting note: Macgyver had amnesia and climbed above a ship to escape the bad guys before Jason Bourne did.  A mini license plate forms a guide for a bike chain.
For Love or Money: Carbon black, some gas and a latex glove and a strip of duct tape form a nice smoke bomb.  Nitroglycerin tablets made to start up a bad heart crushed into a powder with alcohol added in makes a good, very reactive paste.  Bailing wire tied to a car battery and rigged to the exterior of the car make a sketch security system

Season 3
Lost Love: A pulley to hold up a fake dragon to make a hostage transfer.  A quick rag to gag someone.
Back From the Dead: A fishing net knocks someone down for a bit.
Ghost Ship: A tarp and a stick make a great paddle.  A fishing spindle makes a good tripline.  The following snap of a fishing rod stuck in a tree notch strikes a knockout punch.
Fire and Ice: A rake end screwed onto the end of a garden hose works as a great grappling hook.  A bar of soap helps you make a copy of the key you need.  Pencil lead shavings reveal fingerprints and narrow down the options on a lock combo.  A welder is helpful if you’re looking to cut through a safe door.
GX-1: Stuff pine needles in between shirts for insulation.  Then form makeshift boots from duct tape and a sleeping bag mat.  Old refrigerator and a bunch of sheets and a parachute and an aluminum shack with a helium bottle make a balloon.
Jack in the Box:
Mix carbide from miners lights with water to make acetylene gas to make a nice diversion and simulate a mine explosion.
The Widowmaker: A car battery, jumper cables and an extended rod form a nice arc welder.  Some rope gets him up a telephone pole while a bracelet hitting the phone wire makes an SOS.  Don’t try this at home.  If you had to watch one episode, this is a pretty full one!
Hell Week: Acetic acid and ammonia spray form a brief mist cloud.  A dustpan holds the elevator.  Liquid nitrogen freezes mercury to make it transportable without moving.  Pressure to vaporize mercury.
Blow Out: Make some tear gas: baking soda, cayene powder, vinegar, store it in a hot water bottle to make a nasty surprise cocktail for some people robbing a grocery store.  Watch out for old people too; they can be good allies!
Kill Zone: A hole in a paint can placed on a muffler forms a great trace.  Covering a bomb in wet cement will help contain the blast pretty well.
Early Retirement: A railroad cooling gas forms a great way to flush people out of a boxcar.
The Odd Triple: A bunch of nitrogen tanks and a 1000 pound barrel of wine form a great battering ram.
Thin Ice: Pretty much all psychological, coach a troubled kid to be a team player. He did improvise with a spring from a ball point pen.
The Negotiator: Antifreeze spilled all over the ground makes a pretty good barrier between you and someone…especially if you throw live jumper cables into the puddle.
The Spoilers: Chlorine and some catalyst make a toxic cloud while an inner tube stuck in a truck cab and inflating is a great time-delayed distraction.  Don’t forget your gas mask!
Mask of the Wolf: Use an iron to mark wavy lines on the bottom of your ski and get more traction.  A combination of copper and zinc lit can make a quick pressure spike.  A bunch of snow with a jacket makes a decent dummy from far off.
Rock the Cradle: A fire extinguisher forms a quick injection into the hydraulics to get some stuck landing gear down.  Duct tape and a cloth make an improvised diaper.  Want an awesome cradle for your little one?  Make it from a sleeping bag, string, hockey sticks and a cargo net.
The Endangered: Matches and rum for a fireball.  A bandana and stick make a javelin to make some poachers think they’re going a different way.  Put together a tranquilizer dart, some fishing line and a sapling to make a good trap.  Lymmanite (yellow stone) makes a bright marker.   A flashlight barrel and elastic cord make a tranquilizer dart gun.
Murderer’s Sky: Radio static from speakers send out sound waves.  Put the speakers close to the wall and listen carefully; the sound will bounce back if you’re near a hollow wall.  Duct tape, wood and some brown paper form a way to blend in with the surroundings…at least for enough time to surprise your assailants!

Season 4
The Secret of Parker House: A skull, some erasers and clay form a facial reconstruction with an even layer of skin.  A big cylinder capped off makes a good torpedo.
Blood Brothers: A ball point pen forms a nice rod to fix and old school typewriter spindle.  Phynolpythalaline and drain cleaner are a useful combination.
The Outsiders: Saved by the Amish.  Macgyver uses a line to lower a small boy into a derrick.  Some barrels form a weakly braced underground tunnel that distributes a person’s weight.
On a Wing and a Prayer: Make a patch for a water plane skid with fiberglass from a lifejacket and melted rubber for epoxy.  To patch an oil line, use a fire extinguisher hose.  If you have a short runway and some rocket launchers, make a simultaneous switch and off you go!
Collision Course: A racing flag shores up a leak in a racecar.
The Survivors: Combine battery acid, potassium bromide bicarbonate, ammonia capsules (see first aid kit), orange juice to temporarily expose film.  A slip knot and hammer form a quick grappling hook.
Deadly Dreams: A fake toilet and shooting a disposal helps the cops prevent the crooks from getting rid of the evidence in a drug bust.
Cleo Rocks: Smelling the residue scraped from a severed wire into a spoon and then heated with a bunsen burner reveals sulfur from an explosive.  A stick, a string and a swiss army knife form a hook to get around a deadly trip wire.
Fraternity of Thieves: Carbonation and a bunch of baby powder make a good smoke screen.  Sodium thiosulfate from a photo processor is a cure for a KGB gas agent smelling like almonds.  Rewiring a helicopter signal can give someone quite a shock.
The Battle of Tommy Giordano: A telephone chord makes a nice way to keep two doors shut if you wrap it around the handles multiple times.  Electrical cables in general are quite useful!  Alcohol, ammonia and acid form a smoke screen
The Challenge: Alcohol on a swap reveals the difference between printers ink and a designed sticker.
Runners: Ties a garbage bin to a car to put some drag on some pursuing bad guys.  Uses his swiss army knife to get in through a window.
Gold Rush: A gas cylinder wrapped in some nylon and put in a bucket with some alcohol set on fire makes a nice bomb-like way to burst out of an avalanche trap.  It turns out 100 million in gold going down a slope on a sled makes a pretty good battering ram.  I’m sure you’ll all have a chance to apply that one!
The Invisible Killer: Enter the mystery man and some heavy suspense.  Some fresh limbs and fishing line make a good trap.  Vinegar and pepper plus grease in the interior of a telescope makes a good projectile to temporarily stun an assailant.
Brainwashed: Make people shoot you in the mirror as opposed to directly.  Take people who are sleepwalking to a shrink.  This made me never want to agree to be brainwashed or hypnotized ever!
Easy Target:
Remove detonator from a grenade and you’ve got your raw C4 material to do with what you will.  To hot wire a car, get access to the leads in the steering column.  Unite the black and red wires, then briefly touch the circuit with the ground (white) wire. 
Renegade:
A paddle makes a great weapon.  While everyone else stands around arguing about what to do, Macgyver grabs a bike and is on his way.  Make it happen people!
Unfinished Business: A fly rod makes a good way to reach further and avoid booby traps in your way.

Season 5
Cease Fire: A backpack forms a makeshift climbing harness to swing down off a cable car and detach a bomb.  Don’t forget your swiss army knife to cut through the attachment.
The Black Corsage: Splitting a wire connected through an outlet and attaching it to a priceless piece of jewelry makes a nice booby trap.
The Legend of The Holy Rose1:
Undoubtedly one of the coolest things Mac has ever built.  An ultralight aircraft in a matter of about 4 hours with bamboo, plastic, duct tape, string, a motor and prop from a fan.  Seriously DON’T try this at home!
The Legend of The Holy Rose2: A flag, flag stand and rope make a type of grappling hook. I think they get some physics incorrect here, but a solar collector and amplifier make a pretty strong beam of light.
Halloween Knights: A finger facsimile is made from a fingerprint on a glass with pool chalk dusted over it.  When transferred onto melted wax you’ve got a nice model.
Second Chance: A small tube and tranquilizer needle makes a nice blow dart, while a shoe lace soaked in alcohol makes a fuse for a pressurized can.
Children of The Light:
A plank lodged between the floor and doorknob forms a quick lock for a door.  An antenna and a lot of cable make a temporary zip line.
The Ten Percent Solution:
Acetylene in a hollow fire door with a spark from a lightbulb wire shorting out will blow you out of the prison.  
Two Times Trouble:
Fingerprints are revealed with some dry powder paint on a mirror and on a glass.
Serenity: A flag pole line makes a great climbing line while a swiss army knife deflects a bullet.
Live and Learn:
Center of gravity lesson: Macgyver uses leverage to mess with a larger defensive end.  Also shows the matchstick and two forks cocktail party trick to make a perfect balance on the rim of a glass.  Reading a burned report: glycerol in a spray bottle softens the ash, spread it out in between two pieces of glass, then an IR camera reveals left over ink.  One of my favorite episodes.
The Treasure of Manco:
Sometimes a corrupt government cannot be changed from within.  So you fight it.  Recently watched Code Geass and saw some similarities. 
Jenny’s Chance:
Invent a strategy to anticipate how a con thinks and then form a counter attack.
Passages: Make an effective lure out of a shiny gum wrapper.  Love is not some bill to be paid on holidays and weekends.  A fire hose tied between a ship’s hull door and the propeller shaft busts out a prisoner and prevents Macgyver from dying.  Death’s just another step along the way?
Humanity: Want to live?  You must find a reason for your captor to keep you alive.  A fishing pole cast makes a good distraction.  Macgyver helps a man who was snake bitten even though he was about to kill him in cold blood.  Why I will never be a soldier: quote from elite force: “Soldiers are not taught to think.  You will fight who I tell you to fight.”  I asked a soldier friend and he said they were trained to be a machine as opposed to improvise because it ensures everyone knows what everyone else will do and not mess up the operation.  Seems like this would be good in some situations and not in others.  Since others probably know these tactics, I assume that execution, as in many parts of life, is of extreme importance.

Season 6
Tough Boys: Can handles and the starter chord of a lawnmower with a crowbar are used as a fish hook to pull up a bar on the outside of a door.  A ladder with a firehose fed through makes a great water cannon.
The Gun: C-4 material from of grenades, a wire from a laser, straps used to pack crates together, packets to contain two C-4 pancakes and a battery to connect the leads forms a way to knock out 2 of the pylons lifting up a shipping crate and dumping the cargo while keeping those formerly prisoners safe inside.
Twenty Questions: A 20 question test reveals alcoholism in an annoying teen.
The Wall: A road flare’s smoke reveals a laser sight.  Goo from a toy store provides just enough lubrication to loosen ropes.  A blimp makes a nice distraction while a drum dropped on someones head makes a good temporary bind.
Lesson in Evil: Evil cannot be beaten by just confronting it.  Evil follows no pattern and strikes anyone.  Evil never plays fair which is why it will always win.  A gigantic bell knocks evil off it’s platform and to it’s death.  If only it were so easy in real life.
MacGyver’s Women: Men are afraid of emotion and women?  A belt buckle allows MacGyver to slip out of a noose.  A horse is a great power source to pull down the supports of a roof.
The Visitor: A good salesman always manages to be where he’s needed most.  All we get is right here, right now.  Some barbed wire scraped with Sodium Chloride and then  used to arc between two electrical wires forms a UFO illusion.
Squeeze Play: If you’re quick, dodging into a shed and then out before a pursuing guard dog can figure out what’s up might help.  Recording the sounds from a touch tone phone let Macgyver find out what number to dial.  Turn on some machines for background noise and a distraction.
The Wasteland: A pool queue is helpful for self defense, but 5 to 1 odds aren’t such a good idea.  A fan from a wind tunnel, some carabiners and climbing rope, and a large square piece of tent make a powered parachute to save a man’s life.
There But For the Grace: Foraging is an essential skill if you’re homeless (or pretending to be).  Staple gunning someone to the ground in a leather jacket is a fairly effective form of restraint.  A rubber glove tied over a methane hose with a light bulb around provides a spark for an explosion.
Blind Faith: Don’t let glaucoma go untreated for too long! If someone’s rushing you with a metal I-beam and you have a high voltage source sitting around, connect the red wire with the metal they’re touching and you’ll stun them as long as you keep the current low enough.
Faith, Hope & Charity: A saw cuts through ropes tying your hands together.  Weakened wooden stairs form a trap while various heavy bookcases help form a defensive stance.  Cayenne pepper in a kitchen mop and hot soup shot through a vacuum cleaner make some defensive “weapons”.
Sticky Business: Ground up shotgun shell pellets form a hot environment to solder the barrel of a shotgun to some trip wires and make a passage through an electric fence.
Trail of Tears: Early warning trip wire tied to a bunch of tin cans.  Use a rod to ram a rag down an air pressure line facing a door.  A feather works as a cauter pin to stop a bomb.
Hind-Sight: A first aid kit on a submarine has some flares and a flare gun.  Tie the flare gun to a rod and then to hold the trigger back form a time delay fuse.  Oxygen released into a room filling with water explodes as the trigger for the flare gun is pressed. This one reviewed a lot of hacks in one episode, so if you’re interested check it out!

Season 7
The Coultons: If you’re a bounty hunter a bullet proof vest is highly recommended.  A bottle of sulfuric acid brought over by a dog to a lever made of a ruler and other bottle eats through ropes like a charm.  Shooting a chandelier or something on top of someone may be a better option than shooting them directly.  If you’re going to kill someone, you should immediately check if they’re dead.
The ‘Hood: A rake through a doorknocker holds people off for a bit.  Wax spilled on a burnt match book allows Mac to read the name on the top.
Honest Abe: A piece of string dragged through a candle makes a fuse for really old brandy that’s now mostly alcohol.  A fireplace blower turns the alcohol into a fine mist, perfect to create a diversion.  A steel ring banged onto the floor and a piece of cotton starts the flame.
The Prometheus Syndrome: Simulating a bomb setup can help you diffuse the real one and find out what types of explosives are being used.  Pushing the pin out will loosen a joint, then ramming a forklift into a door covers Macgyver from a bomb.  A canvas sheet helps him get through a brief blaze.  A magnetic switch can be reversed with a magnet.
Walking Dead: A rope snuck through a hole in a coffin busts MacGyver out.
Good Knight Macgyver1: Macgyver uses electrophoresis to make vanadium in a dream where he travels back to Camelot’s court.
Good Knight Macgyver2: Alcohol depletes your energy.  A dog whistle can be made from a brass tube surrounded by paper around it.  A credit card like object is used to open a door.  Vitriol and zinc makes hydrogen gas.  Pull apart a robe to make a kite string, then use leather canteen filled with hydrogen to get it into the air.  With a knife tied to the bottom of the string and a ferocious lightning storm gives a real life Ben Franklin reenactment.  Don’t forget that every scientist does a test run before the big performance!
Deadly Silents: A wallet stuck with a knife gives a way to slow down a fall by cutting a fabric wall.  A boot and firehose allow Mac to grab a ladder to get out of a pool tank trap.  Some bolts just barely holding onto a motel facade for a movie scene make a nice trap to knock out some bad guys.
Split Decision: An alternating punch machine and a hydraulic punch measurement system help train a boxer.  Add water to sodium thiosulfate to treat boxing cuts and stop bleeding.  If you want to control a man, control what he cares about the most.
Gunz ‘N Boyz: Busting out an external A/C unit gives a quick entrance to a locked door.  An A/C duct with strap wrapped around it and a keg inserted in is combined with a bucket with broken wood pieces soaked in alcohol that are set alight next to the top of the keg.  This makes a sweet battering ram to open a door.  Yeah, so it was a bit complicated…
Off the Wall: Look at slants in various letters to find out if the same person has forged multiple signatures.  An air duct works as a quick escape route for a bomb.
The Mountain of Youth: A tracking beacon shows where an underground spring is getting diverted to.  A scarf wrapped around a vial of water prevents the glass from going everywhere after it is broken.  Then the cut glass can be used as a wire stripper.  A cock stopper gives the impression that a door is still locked.  A ladder makes a good battering ram.
The Stringer: Take what life gives you and make the most of it.  Macgyver finds out he has a son!  Some people can only be happy when they’re on the road.  Murder is not justice. Macgyvers answer for most things, specifically “where’d you learn to do that?”.  I don’t know, it just kindof made sense!  Only fools are sure of anything; a wise man keeps on guessing.  3000lbs of water pressure makes some temporary jet packs.  A flare gun makes a small mutiny.  Where to?  Somewhere else?

I greatly admire MacGyver’s ability to make friends and how he treats women and children with respect while also working to protect them if possible.  His ability to be cool under pressure is also encouraging; although some of his stunts seem sure to get an person in a real situation killed.  He also is nearly always upbeat and encouraging.  I wonder what he would have done if he had some newer electronics to work with!  Remember that locking someone in a room with anything but bare walls is a very bad plan.  Always look around you and start your planning with what you’ve got!

External References (For those who just can’t get enough!):

I don’t know how good it is, but if you’re interested further outside of checking out the YouTube Archives directly, grab a copy of the MacGyver How-To-Handbook!  Regarding some product placement, MacGyver has been seen sporting gear from Minnesota University, Nike, and Swiss Army.  Also, after I was half way through this archive, I found someone else dedicated enough to compile one:  See List of Problems Solved by MacGyver.

Oh wait, there’s still more you won’t want to miss!  If you thought MacGyver was good, just wait til you check out the contemporary version at Hulu from USA: Burn Notice!  Look back for a similar post on Michael Weston!


Tickle Tests

March 5, 2008

First let me just say that I really do not know why anyone would read these. Honestly, I took them mostly to find out more about myself and there are a lot of them, and so you must be either extremely bored, an extremely good friend, or extremely in love with me. All that said, I hope you enjoy reading these; I would love to hear your feedback!

I have left nothing out, so what is here is the real me. Honestly, I think these tests generally flatter you, maybe so you will buy their more in depth reports. None the less, they have helped me gain significant insight into who I am as a human being. Read the rest of this entry »